caffeine-fiend:

mattypwhatwhat:

I don’t under stand racism

because people are like eggs

some have light shells and some have dark shells

but there’s no point differentiating them

because they all taste the same once you crack them open and empty their guts on the frying pan

Wait until the vegans find this.

(via captainderp)

cailiin:

unacandrid:

how much deeper would the ocean be without sponges

what

(via captainderp)

ptrparker:

during sex when he least suspects it, scream “EA GAMES” followed by whispering “challenge everything”

(via legalprostitute)

noire-pandora:

I am that type of douchebag friend who doesn’t talk with you for weeks but still cares about you and hopes you still care too.

(via arkhamalleycat)